


The Fighter At Journey's End

by SunflowerSpectre



Series: Works of 2019 [1]
Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Episode: s04e13 Journey's End, F/M, Journey's End, Songfic, Takes place during/after, song: Fighter by Kana Boon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-11
Updated: 2019-09-11
Packaged: 2020-10-14 19:15:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,131
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20605919
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SunflowerSpectre/pseuds/SunflowerSpectre
Summary: A songfic taking place during Journey’s End featuring Fighter by Kana Boon | The Doctor is a lonely warrior





	The Fighter At Journey's End

**Author's Note:**

  * For [DeepestKoalaPeach](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=DeepestKoalaPeach).

> Writing commission for DeepestKoalaPeach

_ Somebody’s screams are crumbling away… _

_ Each time you step forward, you can hear the sounds of pain. _

_ You’ve grown so used to hearing the fragments of that wailing voice… _

_ You’ve known from the start that it was your voice all along. _

‘The apotheosis of Darvos’ genius’ was horrifying, the Doctor realized. A reality bomb in itself didn’t quite seem like a good idea - nor something that should exist - but it was real. A bit  _ too  _ real. The weight of what it would it mean if he failed started to weigh more heavily on his shoulders. Two hearts and yet it seemed both of them stopped for a moment. 

_ Your brilliance is fleeting, _

_ Like a flower blooming on the battlefield. _

_ So live beautifully, fair Warrior! _

He paused, with such a big brain, he wasn’t sure what to say. His existence - his  _ friendships _ \- with these people shouldn’t change them - not like this. But this was what he did to people, according to Darvos, turning normal people into soldiers. People into murderers. He remembered the excellence he had always seen in them - their wonder and cleverness - and when he saw the people before him, it seemed as though many of them had lost that spark in their eyes. Instead, it turned into a burning fury of war. 

How many  _ did  _ die in his name? How many died for him? A number he would never like to admit, but he remembered each of their names - it pained him that he couldn’t say the same for those who died for him that he didn’t know about. 

He planted his feet firmly on the ground. No matter how high that number was - no matter the names that stained his ledger -  _ no more. _

_ A lonely fighter, _

_ Devoid of love… amidst unending decay… _

_ Even if you can’t reach eternity, keep on fighting! _

_ Go now! To a world free of grief, sins, and pain… _

_ Even if you can’t reach eternity, reach out your hand, Fighter! _

_ And nothing can stop the detonation,  _ Darvos had said. 

Despite the small bit in the back of his brain that wanted to say ‘maybe Darvos is right’ as the hope that they would win started to dwindle, the Doctor forced any bit of doubt down. He looked to the people around him, his ‘children of time’ as it were.  _ No more;  _ no more would die for him,  _ because  _ of him. He would not let them down and he had every bit of faith that they could never let him down either.

With two feet standing firmly on the ground, the Doctor stood tall against the threat, his brain rapidly trying to figure out how to get them out of this situation; even if he couldn’t look Rose in the eyes.

_ You drown amidst an agony no one else can fathom… _

_ The battlefield of solitude is an ocean, expansive as the cosmos. _

_ You may wait for the call, _

_ That would summon you somewhere other than here… _

_ But God has already turned away, departing into the darkness. _

They’re brilliant -  _ oh so brilliant -  _ together. When they exit the TARDIS, the New Doctor and Donna firmly believe that they have it solved. They come out tumbling in like a hurricane, ready to deal the damage due, but they’re shut down before their force forms. With Donna tossed - like nothing, as if she were an afterthought - and the New Doctor trapped, the Doctor found it even harder to believe, truly believe, in both of his hearts, that they may win. 

He faltered; it was small, barely noticeable, but Rose did. She saw the way his eyes flickered into something akin to fear.

_ Your brilliance is fleeting, _

_ So until you burn all the way out, _

_ Live beautifully, fair Warrior! _

Donna was amazing -  _ absolutely brilliant.  _ This new Doctor Donna, memories of the Ood flooded his mind, was their salvation. The timer never stood a chance, its numbers stopping before  _ zero. _

The rest happened in a blur, a fast blur that left the Doctor feeling proud of all that his ‘Children of Time’ were capable of. Each were brilliant in their own ways and with the help of this new Doctor Donna, the Daleks were left, quite literally, spinning in circles. Disabled. Defeated. 

They won. 

_ A lonely fighter, _

_ Devoid of love… amidst unending decay… _

_ Even if you can’t reach eternity, keep struggling! _

_ Go now! break free from the strings controlling you… _

_ Without waiting for permission, head somewhere other than here! _

Dalek Caan demanded  _ ‘no more’  _ and while it was a surprise, it left an odd sensation in the Doctor; a mix of pride and hope swelled in his heart. Dalak Caan, in many ways, stood before him as proof that there was good somewhere deep within the Daleks. That it  _ was _ possible. 

It was a hope and a chance that he would refuse to give up on, that he deserved every Dalek had the chance to prove themselves to be good. To make that choice. To  _ change. _

He held onto that hope tightly when Davros screeched at him, when the words  _ ‘you are the Destroyer of Worlds’  _ echoed in his ears.

_ Oh, Fate interrupted… take off from this place! _

The Doctor never failed to be amazed at how you can both win and lose so much at the same time, a heavy feeling in his heart as he watched the New Doctor depart with Rose. Knowing it was best did not mean that it was easy. 

Donna departed with him in the TARDIS, spinning away from the heartache that threatened to break through his chest. The prospect of future adventures with this new Doctor Donna helped ease the pain that was beginning to surface.

_ A lonely fighter, _

_ Devoid of love… amidst unending decay… _

_ Even if you can’t reach eternity, keep on fighting! _

_ Go now! Change even grief into love and let it ring aloud! _

_ Without waiting for permission, head somewhere other than here! _

_ Your brilliance is fleeting, _

_ So live like a flower blooming on the battlefield, Fighter! _

The rain drenched his coat and he was hardly able to bring himself to remove it as he stepped back inside his TARDIS. His eyes drifted to the time rotor, but he hesitated on setting a new course despite how he wanted to do nothing more than get away as fast as he could, somewhere far away and new.

He needed to get away, he knew, but his body felt too heavy to move. 

He had a big family, Sarah had told him. A family that saved the world, a family that made him a better man, a family that found new people to be with, a family that all had their own homes to go to.

He stood there, a triumphant warrior that had just saved reality itself, and he had never felt more alone.


End file.
